Jul 012013

Elle Chase (Lady Cheeky) is presenting Does This Panel Make Me Look Fat?: Body Image and Sexuality. Check out Elle’s bio here.


Lady CheekyHow do you see yourself as a catalyst for change?

By speaking out, as truthfully as I can about my own experience uncovering, indulging and ultimately integrating my sensuality. I hope I can encourage other women to explore, embark on or continue that journey, especially women over 40 and women with body image concerns.

Who or what was a catalyst for you?

Oddly enough, the TV show ‘True Blood.’ By watching it during the end of my marriage it sparked a realization in me, that I craved, needed and deserved to experience passion in my life. I owe it all to Bill and Sookie!

What do you feel are some of the biggest challenges or concerns facing us in the field of sexuality right now?

One of the biggest challenges we’re facing is helping people understand that women’s sexuality and sensuality is just as vibrant, prevalent and vital as our male counterparts. Women enjoy and want to experience great sex just as much as men do … and often! We aren’t the mercurial creatures that science and the media might make us believe. Our (women’s) sexuality is rich and sensual and absolutely nothing to be guarded or ashamed of. My greatest wish is for women of all ages is to realize, that their sexuality and their sensuality is to be celebrated and expressed, not ignored, shamed or diminished.

What do you feel are some of the most important/valuable positive changes that have been made in the world of sexuality in the past year?

This has been an interesting year for sexuality. I think the “Mission Creep” of sustained messages, like Dan Savage’s reiteration in his column and his new book about how we might re-think monogamy as the “ideal” monotheistic norm is important. His stance of a more flexible idea of what a successful partnership can look like is a powerful and crucial discussion to keep having. Although this idea is not newly proselytized by him, the release of his new book this year brought the topic to the fore in interviews and reviews, giving society another “booster shot” to start thinking of new paradigms when it comes to the choice of monogamy.

Also Tristan Taormino reviving the question “why feminist porn?” and the popularity of her book ‘The Feminist Porn Book.’ The book and Tristan has had a main stream cultural impact, making the need for feminist porn and the humanist idea behind it, more a part of the social conscience. “Feminist Porn” is more a part of the zeitgeist than ever before and I think we owe that to Tristan Taormino. I mean it was even mentioned on SNL!

Most recently though, I don’t think we can ignore the potential impact of Daniel Bergner’s research and ensuing book on female sexuality. Because it’s been getting a lot of press, it may help to drive home the fact that ‘What Women Want’ is sex and a lot of it!

Why do you feel it is important to bring the topic of your session, Does This Panel Make Me Look Fat?: Body Image and Sexuality, to CatalystCon West?

Whether it’s my coaching clients, the readers of my blog(s), friends or even overhearing conversations at Starbucks, it’s clear that most everyone has body image concerns that either predominate or otherwise impact their sex lives. The fact is, the way you feel about how you look, not how you look is the real issue. What your body actually looks like has very little to do with real-life sexual/sensual connection. Hopefully, by getting the word out, that what someone may have believed about their body and their sexual attractiveness isn’t true, we can at the very least, start them on their way to taking back control of their sex lives and enjoying it instead of pining for it.

Share one unknown (or little known) fact about yourself.

I’m fascinated by personality disorders.


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